When you're hurt, your mentality changes. At least mine does. I constantly think that I'm going to lose all of my gains and replace them with fails. I fear that I won't be able to do a pushup. A sit up. A squat thrust.
I finally went back to the doctor. He told me that it was okay to go back to DDIP, but to lay off the high impact exercises and the running for a while. Three more weeks of no high impact exercises and most likely another month to THREE months of long distance running. But, he told me to get back on it and do what I could do.
Something in my body told me to take a break. Let the body rest. It ended up being a bit longer than I had planned, but for some reason I felt like I needed it. I started back to class last Friday, officially. I missed a week and a half of the session. I made sure I made it to a Drill workout on Friday, and started back to regular workouts on Monday.
The first thing we did was pushups. I honestly thought that I wasn't going to be able to do them. And yes, they kind of hurt. Hurt, in the sense that I couldn't do them. However, while they were hard, I could do them. It wasn't impossible. We did more on Wednesday. I started feeling that range of motion come back. I could get all the way down, keep my back straight.
So, I'm back. I have to modify a lot of stuff. I can't do side-straddle hops, I can't run, and I can't jump. But I can modify. I can keep the motivation up. I can keep up with the group.
While I was "hurt," I started losing that motivation. I lost that dedication. But I realized that all I needed was to put one foot in front of the other, make the right steps toward the goal, and not look back.
It's all about hard work and some determination. By the end of the summer, I hope to be running again. Which, when I type that sentence, I can't believe I'm saying it. I want to get out and put the miles behind me, and see the miles in front of me.
Long ways to go. I've come a long way. One little set back isn't gonna push me down. I'll push back.
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